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What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

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What type of Borderline Personality are You?

Low Functioning Borderline
2
4%
High Functioning Borderline
11
24%
Extroverted Borderline
3
7%
Introverted Borderline
15
33%
Transparent Borderline
14
31%
 
Total votes : 45

What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby Apocallcaps » Thu Aug 04, 2011 10:23 am

I saw this posted on a Facebook BPD community and thought it was excellent. While of course it isn't entirely this simple --there are more aspects, and differences in BPD, and in one borderline from another-- but I believe these categories ring true, as part of the different expressions of BPD.

I'd have to say I'm a combination of Introverted Borderline and Transparent Borderline. They both just ring so true.

Seeing these two in myself from the 5 categories, it's no wonder to me why it not only took so long for others to spot, but for me myself to spot. Add to that, I'm male, and doctors didn't often see males and think BPD until years later.

I actually did many screenings of myself since age 23-ish as I suspected something more than Major Depression among my other diagnoses was going on, and I kept coming up as high on BPD but thought "Nahhh", I did bring it up with my psychiatrist though, but he didn't believe in personality disorders, and also didn't want to focus or think about it for whatever reason. He wanted to give me meds.

http://www.borderlineblog.com/what-type ... re-you.php

Low Functioning Borderline - The “Low Functioning” borderline is what most people think of when they are first introduced to the condition. Low functioning BPDs are a living train wreck. They have intense difficulties taking care of their basic needs, are constantly experiencing mood swings. They also have an extremely hard time managing any sort of relationship with another human being. Low Functioning BPDs are often hospitalized more than other BPD types, for the very reason that they can’t live productively without constant coaching and supervision. These patients are challenging for all but the most experienced psychiatrists. Unless otherwise treated, low functioning borderlines lead self destructive lives and attempt to manipulate those around them with desperate acts, including self harm (cutting, etc.).


High Functioning Borderline - The High Functioning Borderline Personality shares many core aspects of the low functioning borderline personality, except for the fact that they can manage their lives, appear to be productive, and generally keep their relationships civil (even diplomatic in nature). High Functioning borderlines can appear to be normal, driven people one moment; then moody, inconsolable, and manipulative the next. Somehow, there is a mechanism within the minds of High Functioning Borderlines that allows them to lead somewhat “competent” lives, despite the fact that they are in a constant battle with BPD. High functioning BPDs are no better than low functioning: it’s basically the same face wearing a different mask.


Extroverted Borderline - Anyone familiar with the Meyer-Briggs personality tests will understand the psychological differences between extroversion and introversion. When these characteristics are mixed with BPD, there are two different results. The Extroverted Borderline pushes all their feelings, fears, manipulation, rage, and moodiness outward to the people around them. In essence, if you are around an extroverted BPD, you feel like you’re living through their emotions while coping with your own at the same time. Further, extroverted BPDs will attempt self abusive acts in plain view of others in order to avoid abandonment or to express their rage. For example, an Extroverted BPD might cut themselves and then immediately share it with family and friends around them, hoping to gain sympathy or attention. In most cases, these types of behaviors frighten non-Borderlines, and they wonder whether or not the Extroverted BPD should be committed to a psych ward.


Introverted Borderline - Contrary to popular belief, “introverted” doesn’t necessarily describe someone who is a recluse (agoraphobic). Instead, introversion is characterized by experiencing life in a self-reflective, private, and at times distant manner. To others, introverts may appear shy or lacking in people skills. This might be true, however, introverts make up for their lack of social skills with rich inner lives, thoughts, and deep thinking. As a result, the introverted Borderline primarily focuses all their BPD emotions and reactions inward. Instead of having a rage episode in public, they might retreat to their rooms and cry for hours on end, perhaps even cutting themselves for their own amusement or as stress relief. Introverted Borderlines live in an odd world: on one hand, they spend most of their time in personal thought and reflection, looking to fill themselves with a viable sense of self; but on the other, they are conflicted by emptiness and the bottomless emotional pit that BPD produces. Introverted BPDs might be harder to “spot” unless you happen to know one personally, in which case you might notice occasional depressive symptoms and evidence of self harm.


Transparent Borderline - The Transparent Borderline is a bit of a mix between a high functioning borderline and either extroverted or introverted tendencies. In plain terms, Transparent Borderlines live double lives: on the surface, “in public”, they appear one way, but in private, amongst immediate family and friends, they appear completely different. As a result, they may or may not be high functioning due to this conflicted state of mind. Transparent Borderlines spend most of their emotional energy trying to balance the personality demands of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, the both of which experience strong BPD emotions like anyone else with the disease. Like Introverted Borderlines, Transparent Borderlines are harder to spot, and often only confess their true disposition after a harrowing rage, major break up, or other severely traumatic event that brings all their BPD feelings to the fore.
"I assess the power of a will by how much resistance, pain, torture it endures and knows how to turn it to its advantage." -- Friedrich Nietzsche
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby bsl9408 » Thu Aug 04, 2011 10:34 am

I've found that throughout the last 5 years or so I've transitioned through all these different types.. perhaps with the exception of low functioning.. currently id probably be transparent.. bit introverted.. high functioning in some aspects like at uni.. its like each day im something completely different.. my boyfriend seems to be the only person who cops it .. occasionally my mum.. but other than that i keep my issues to myself.. cry alone.. constantly think about things.. if i self harm i hide it.. if i self medicate to sleep i hide it .. while people that dont know im borderline think im smart and beautiful and funny and happy .. I was like barbie in high school

so to sum up.. i have no f*cking idea what kind of borderline personality i am .. but i definitely would relate to transparent the most .. so ill vote for that one ..

-- Thu Aug 04, 2011 8:36 pm --

Apoc can I ask your age?
Dx: Borderline Personality Disorder; Social Anxiety Disorder; Dysthemia; Sleep Paralysis
Tx: psych med & therapy free atm
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby bsl9408 » Thu Aug 04, 2011 10:52 am

ah 32, nevermind found it in ur profile
Dx: Borderline Personality Disorder; Social Anxiety Disorder; Dysthemia; Sleep Paralysis
Tx: psych med & therapy free atm
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby ajr8 » Thu Aug 04, 2011 11:35 am

I used to be a high functioning borderline when I was a little kid. I grew up to be transparent and extroverted in my adolescence, and since I entered my 20s I've become 100% low functioning, which is where I am now.
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby Apocallcaps » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:06 pm

Honestly, I could fit into that category somewhat as well. I haven't really worked a proper a job a day in my life and have been on disability from 20-25, my ex worked so I wasn't on disability from 25-32 but am back on it after she left (even though I was in school preparing to find a job), as well as supported by family here and there up until recently. I struggle with normal everyday things in life, have trouble spending money right, taking care of bills, handling everyday responsibilities, and making friendships or relationships of any sort in the real world. I get overwhelmed and shut off quite a lot. I dissociate frequently, I can become semi-delusional at periods in my life as well.

I struggle with school let alone working, but somehow I have an above average IQ and self-study a lot to great effect. There's nothing at all wrong with my attractiveness, either. This is the part that really bugs me; life should be different for me. It would be, if only I were a little bit more functional.

I don't really 'lose it' though and end up in hospitals. I think I'm just really good at putting on appearances. I also think it was easy to kid myself while I was married. I think I'm getting better, and better able to handle my own stuff, but then again I'm getting a lot help through support agencies. I don't like this,.. at all.

-- Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:08 pm --

I lose it with family though. But again, I can pull it together enough to not end up in hospitals. I haven't seen family in a very long time, anyway. All I saw was my ex, mostly.
"I assess the power of a will by how much resistance, pain, torture it endures and knows how to turn it to its advantage." -- Friedrich Nietzsche
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby Apocallcaps » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:23 pm

The question is, how much of that has to do with Major Depression and social anxiety disorder? And since they've never been able to treat my depression to any great extent, that kinda makes the BPD hard to treat.

Man, I'm fked...
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby ajr8 » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:24 pm

I have a lot of the same problems as you, and in some ways I know I shouldn't. I'm highly intelligent and I can self teach in subjects that actually interest me, but when it comes to school I never did learn how to study or do homework and my brain just isn't suited for academics. My first job was last summer and it was so unbearable that I quit in less than four months, and I was teetering on the edge of quiting since my first week. The job I have now is no better, I've been taking excessive absences claiming it's for medical reasons and the first chance I get to either quit or get fired, I'll be done with the job. As for bills, I've never paid any bills. My family has always paid for all my needs and it's no different now, and along the way I've learned sophisticated ways of manipulating my family into giving me extra money, enough to actually start to save it as if I'm working. My looks have never been a problem, everyone tells me I'm hot, but they all quickly realize how disturbed I am so they run away from me before long, so I can't keep a stable relationship at all and all my relationships with friends and family are seriously troubled and strained. I'm a mess so I'll take that to mean I am currently of the low functioning type seeing that I have no sense of responsibility, no goals, no future, and currently no control over my emotions or behavior.
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby Apocallcaps » Thu Aug 04, 2011 12:45 pm

I hear you, as far as control over my emotions and behavior, I believe I do have that, or else I would end up in hospitals? I don't know. How do you personally define that, that you have no control over your emotions or behavior?

I believe I have goals,.. I don't want to live on disability my entire life. I've got my own apartment/flat though and have since 18 but it has been through family, disability, my ex, and now disability + rental assistance.

I was trying to go to school, I finished two years with full marks, but the imminent separation caused me to break down and I slowly began to fall behind in school by going less and less. It started with telling the teachers "I just got a text, I've got a family emergency", to coming in half way through the school day, to skipping out all together. I felt good about my schooling and wanted to finish the other 2 years and have a full degree but at the moment I just can't care about anything. I remember that going to school made me feel healthier, and helped my depression, and I began to make friends.

I believe I want to have a stable job, and a stable, steady relationship again but I just don't see how it's going to happen. My med helps, but it doesn't do enough. I am going to try therapy soon here but I'm not certain if that will work or not,.. I'll try. Basically, I don't want this life and I never have. I believe I only want the stable, decent job for the money--so I can have more access to the things others have.

I shouldn't have to say why I want a relationship...

And yes, I get interested looks, but I've got this funny feeling that once they realized how fked I am they wont be interested. It wont stop me from trying at some stage. Basically, I'm feeling that my best and only hope is to find a woman as fked, or close to as fked up as I am. She might not make for the best partner, but to me it would be better than nothing. At least I'd have someone.

I could also seriously do with a simple f--k. :evil:
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby JohnnyBlaze » Thu Aug 04, 2011 1:45 pm

I'm definitely a high functioning introvert. I'm fortunate in that I'm high functioning, as once my rage passes a point, there is no turning back; it goes from a fight to a fight to the death. If I was low functioning, I'm sure that I'd be doing time for assault or manslaughter by now. Because of that, rather than take it out on the world, I take it out on myself. It used to be alcohol en masse, now it's cutting. At least that way, if anything happens, it's only me who loses. It's safer that way.

Edit I: I can often (but not always) stifle rage until I'm out of range of whoever the intended target is. My GP and psychiatrists figure it's because I'm HF - that's the only reason I consider myself lucky...relatively speaking.

Edit II: Sorry; I can't find a way to say that without sounding condescending. I really don't mean it that way, and I'm sorry if anyone took offense to it.

Apocallcaps wrote:
Introverted Borderline - ...perhaps even cutting themselves for their own amusement or as stress relief.

As a cutter, I find this line morbidly funny. I haven't really thought about it that way, but I'm sure I've done it for self-amusement once or twice in my life. Still funny, though.
Last edited by JohnnyBlaze on Thu Aug 04, 2011 6:42 pm, edited 3 times in total.
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Re: What type of Borderline Personality are You? (with poll)

Postby crimsonandclover » Thu Aug 04, 2011 2:11 pm

Whichever really screwed up is ;P
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