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Will counselling get me over my childhood?

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Re: Will counselling get me over my childhood?

Postby Echinacea » Fri Jul 22, 2016 2:33 pm

I can relate (see blog if needed)

I believe is it a great thing to put your childhood demons to bed with therapy (if you can)

I myself feel 70% better from the therapy recently i never told anyone my childhood..not a therapist until April this year, i am have to say i have a better understanding of a lot of the stuff now and i also spoke to my mother in detail about how it was wrong of her to place so much trust in her men and the amuse her and them did to me and she explain from her side ...now i get both sides i can see her frustration on her side ..if you only see one sided its hard to truly understand, we thats what helped me (im 47 btw)
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Re: Will counselling get me over my childhood?

Postby triplemoon18 » Fri Jul 22, 2016 2:34 pm

Thanks NightOwl - I went to counselling yesterday and I really liked her - she was really pretty and soft spoken. I managed not to be a blubbering mess, which is usually what counselling is like for me - I felt pretty good after the hour session and I am looking forward to seeing her next week. I got teary eyed a couple of times and she seemed to be teary eyed too, so I think she really cares. She was great at validating everything I said - so of course I loved that! I was also happy when she said that my face lit up when I spoke about my children and she could see how important they are to me - they really are. My whole life has been trying to NOT be anything like my parents, so it nice to see that I pretty much succeeded at it.

-- Fri Jul 22, 2016 9:41 am --

Echinacea - I did talk about my childhood a lot when I was in counselling at 16 and 17 when they diagnosed me with BPD (they never told me), but I was too young to really process it then and I was still living with my dad and seeing my mom every week.

When I read my psych report from back then a couple months ago - my psychiatrist had written that my dad's controlling and dictator type personality would not help matters and that they would have to consider removing me from his care. And he said that my mom's coping skills were lacking and it was good that I wasn't in her care. They said I was insecurely attached to both of them and I kind of like that he saw that - so it isn't just me imagining things.

It is only in the last couple years that I have been able to talk about my childhood and how awful they are and I think talking about it releases a lot of the emotions because I used to feel ashamed that I had such bad parents - that there was something wrong with me because of it and I didn't want people to know about it.

Glad to hear it helped you about 70% - I would like therapy to do that. I am 43 and do not want to live the next half of my life being dragged down. How long were you in counselling? I am trying to figure out how long I should attend.
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Re: Will counselling get me over my childhood?

Postby Nightowl9910 » Fri Jul 22, 2016 2:46 pm

No worries triplemoon18. Very glad to hear that it went that well! Sounds to me like you picked a very good counsellor choice so far. Hoping that things continue for you as they've started off!
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Re: Will counselling get me over my childhood?

Postby Echinacea » Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:01 pm

How long were you in counselling? I am trying to figure out how long I should attend.


Im actually still in therapy atm, though she really thinks i am healing nicely, i have never really had a problem managing my BPD issues (as ive always chose bfs that wouldn't leave me, and stayed out of stressful situations like bfs without mothers i clash with mothers ..i did with my own)

i have always found my own strategies to house my rage, abandonment, attachment/dependencies within the relationship that my therapist is only concerned with helping to heal my inner child and the PTSD from my last relationship.

Im not actually sure how long i will be in therapy but it has been definitely worth it.

Dont put a timer on it is my advice ...that way there is no restrictions ..let it flow
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