Moderator: lilyfairy
Leili wrote:I think some of this is just the normal progression of a relationship. He might not compliment you all the time but he shows you he cares by buying you gifts. And of course his family comes first. I find it hard to expend a lot of effort with people in different directions. I have to focus, but it doesn't mean I'm devaluing the other person. Don't let it become a constant topic of conversation or he may feel like he can't meet your needs and move on.
and started spending all his time with them and was working on building them a board game. He finished it the next day!!
SparkilyGurl wrote:Leili wrote:I think some of this is just the normal progression of a relationship. He might not compliment you all the time but he shows you he cares by buying you gifts. And of course his family comes first. I find it hard to expend a lot of effort with people in different directions. I have to focus, but it doesn't mean I'm devaluing the other person. Don't let it become a constant topic of conversation or he may feel like he can't meet your needs and move on.
Thanks so much for the advice loves. But are you saying im not as important as his family, and that he should love his family more than me? Isnt it a different kind of love tho?
green m+m wrote:and started spending all his time with them and was working on building them a board game. He finished it the next day!!
Why, that bastard!
This is why from now on I am only picking men without a family.
Leili wrote:SparkilyGurl wrote:Leili wrote:I think some of this is just the normal progression of a relationship. He might not compliment you all the time but he shows you he cares by buying you gifts. And of course his family comes first. I find it hard to expend a lot of effort with people in different directions. I have to focus, but it doesn't mean I'm devaluing the other person. Don't let it become a constant topic of conversation or he may feel like he can't meet your needs and move on.
Thanks so much for the advice loves. But are you saying im not as important as his family, and that he should love his family more than me? Isnt it a different kind of love tho?
Well, I think it depends on the state of your relationship and what his needs are. If he is healthier around his family, he should get that time in. If you guys are really serious, living together, talking about the future, then he needs to learn balance. At some point you absolutely become priority. I was with my ex for 12 years and I think it took 2 or 3 before he realized my place in his life. Even the we still had occasional struggles about his priorities. I do agree that 2 months is a long time to wait for a letter. But maybe he procrastinated because it hurt him that you were gone and he was trying to stay distracted.
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