Lonely...

So lonely right now, but I don't want to interact with others?

Even if I wanted to go out, I'm trying to avoid seeing friends because they all drink heavily and take drugs. They aren't bad people but I know drink/drugs effects me too much and I need to stay away from it all.

I wish I had that special someone ... But I can't cope with relationships so I avoid them.

I always want something that I know I can't cope with.

Can anyone else relate ? Anyone else sat at home this Saturday avoiding life?

Yes, and I have a feeling lots of people feel this way from time to time, some more than others. Go out, during the day or whatever, when your friends are straight = limited isolation and no drugs. That is, unless your friends get scat all the time in which case cas drugs don't suit you... find new ones. There are keys to shackles everywhere- never give up searching.

-- Sun Aug 16, 2015 9:18 am --

Yes, and I have a feeling lots of people feel this way from time to time, some more than others. Go out, during the day or whatever, when your friends are straight = limited isolation and no drugs. That is, unless your friends get scat all the time in which case cas drugs don't suit you... find new ones. There are keys to shackles everywhere- never give up searching.

The following link has helped me allot in my loneliness, don't be fooled that it's a wiki-guide thing; it's really good in my humble opinion.

http://www.wikihow.com/Stop-Feeling-Lonely

i was going through a period of feeling lonely recently but then i started talking to men on dating sites which leads to be fb friends with them and has on a couple of occasions now led to sex. i don't really like to go out to socialising this way helps me avoid going out of the house. relationships are a trigger but this way i can keep them at arms length.

I've been forcing self-isolation on myself for a few days now. The reason why is because I feel like such a burden lately, to the people I interact with on a regular basis, I've been having unbelievable mood swings and panicking fits of needing someone to comfort me. I don't really have anyone who I trust, like a partner, in my life, so I end up having these fits to friends who I don't feel comfortable with, then I feel embarrassed and isolate myself. Problem is, when I isolate myself, I tend to abuse substances and self-harm a ton. I've been trying to use these few days I've been spending secluded in my room, to work on my art. But all I've been feeling is loneliness, and an undeniable awareness that I can't make any meaningful connections with anyone outside my room.

Thanks for your replies everyone . I didn't get them until now. I'm still in this state of mind but a little bit better than I was. And thanks for the advice

Sa113- pretty much everything you just wrote I can relate with. I sometimes have outbursts to friends and feel embarrassed after. Then I completely go in on myself. i don't really drink or take heavy drugs these days , but sometimes I do smoke weed to escape which I know isn't good. I wish I had a partner too, but I don't trust anyone. I seclude myself because I feel like I don't know how to act around others , I'm too conscious I don't self harm anymore, but the urge is strong sometimes. I hope you feel better now than when you wrote this . I know how it feels. If you want to dm me to talk feel free

Do I ever relate to this..

Since I had to stop working, and my illnesses various as they are got worse I found myself with fewer 'friends' and eventually not even the people I only thought of as 'people I chat to sometimes' either wanted to talk to me, or in many cases, me to them.

I was weirdly ok with that for quite a while, I was increasingly socially phobic anyway, and had been through some more extreme behaviours while my PTSD was at its very worst so I didn't feel confident being out and about.

I also didn't like using the phone, I still don't.

I have managed to make a sort of friend out of a neighbour who is also poorly and spends a lot of her time alone, so we have cups of tea together sometimes. We have very little in common otherwise and I keep my cards very close to my chest.

I got it in my head I wanted a/some penpals, I love writing letters, real ones on paper with stamps.. and it seems the internet has plenty of places you can find people who love that too.

Unfortunately my husband is very worried by all this, he doesn't think its safe to give away our address to people online, not even my name for that matter. So after I had already enthusiastically been looking, and sending messages to a few people, including giving my address to a lady in the UK knowing she was unlikely to be a Nigerian man trying to get me to send money or whatever other scams they warn you about online and my husband was worried about.

For some stupid reason when he was talking to me about how maybe we could get a PO box number so I could do this safely etc I neglected to tell him I had already gone and given my details to someone...and I didn't tell him until he found a letter on the doorstep.

This isn't the first time I have avoided telling him something, I was like it as a kid. I get so worried about how to explain when I realise I have done something stupid, that I avoid it until its too late and I just end up looking shady and like he cant trust me.

Now the penpal thing is a bone of contention, ive really blown it. Yes my husband isn't well either, he gets so paranoid but I think he had his reasons here.

Doh.. lonliness makes me do super dopey incautious things.