that
- “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
Moderator: lilyfairy
I was not offended. I only meant that we cannot always wear our feelings on our sleeve, as it it were. That sometimes we need to develop thicker skin and be less easily affected by what others say or do, which can be easier said than done...jaus tail wrote:@angelinbluejeans: not meaning to offend you but people can make others feel inferior without their consent.
I do agree that sometimes it is important to defend ourselves, other times walk away; and, yet other times, we may need to decide whether what they have to say is reasonable or not and if we need to make some adjustments accordingly. And, besides, isn't there some expression (to the effect of): 'no matter what you do or say 50% of the people are going to like you and 50% of the people are going to hate you'?....right?...if a friend insults me or makes fun of me in front of a group of people just so others laugh at his joke, then i would feel bad n let down.
the opposite of it would be feeling indifferent. like i'd be indifferent to whatever anyone says about me. that's not good. i should stand up for myself to the friend or avoid the friend.
and to stand up to the friend for insulting me, i must want to defend myself n for that i must be affected by what unhealthy remark was passed towards me..
Hey! Guy, I'd like to understand you more...GuyNewToThis wrote:Reading a lot of scary things that I see in myself. Question: how do you develop the coping skills / behavior modifications to be less conflict oriented? My mind is chaotic and combative, even when I'm alone. It's hard to get any peace.
New to this forum. My first post.
Thanks.
GuyNewToThis wrote:So continuing on the subject letha started:
People often hate me too, but I get why. People often try to connect to me but I'm guarded and standoffish. People think I'm snobby, feel rejected then resent me. It only becomes a problem when they gossip about me b/c I get injured and treat them like vermin going forward, exacerbating the problem.
Btw, didn't expect this but that first post of mine was quite cathartic, like a burden removed. I wonder if I should start therapy? Maybe group. Thoughts?
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