ElKahn wrote:I just can't get myself to think that it is possible for me to actually change. And do I really want it?
What sent you to go and get psychotherapy? Presumably there was something about yourself/the way you think/something else that made you decide you wanted some help? Going to your therapy would imply a desire to not continue to do/think etc whatever it is that you are not happy with that sent you to therapy in the first place, and the only way to not continue to do something you aren't happy with is to change. So unless you are being legally forced into therapy and escorted there, the act of you going seems to imply that there is something you are not happy with that has sent you there and that you want to change and believe it is possible in some regard...
ElKahn wrote:She repeats too much on "you don't have to do this, you have to do that" without giving me the proper ways to actually do that. She sounds unprofessional. Sometimes I feel like she wants to impose things, and I hate when someone tells me what to do.
Have you brought up this problem with her? If you feel like she is trying to impose things on you that is important to bring up that you are feeling like that. It will be an important thing to discuss. She might not actually feel like she has anything at all that she wants you to do but your own feelings and beliefs might be causing you to interpret her words as being demanding and imposing, so this would be important to discuss so that either she can adjust her behaviour or she can tell you she doesn't feel like there are things she wants you to do and you can realise that this feeling is something you might be bringing to the relationship.
ElKahn wrote:Are we really untreatable?
I remember a past mod from this forum many many years ago who found that treatment worked wonders for her. So I don't know if it helps to know that at least some BPD people can help their lives heaps from having treatment.
ElKahn wrote:I don't know, I don't like the way she's handling the situation.
Again, this is important to bring up with her. A lot of the way therapy works is by healing through the relationship you have with your therapist.
blank identity wrote:One thing I have learned is that truth is not always absolute. It is more often relative and based upon OTHER people's own perspectives and opinions.
Nice observation. My current therapist always says that the truth (at least in relationships) is actually a construct made up of what the two people bring to the relationship with their interpretations of the other which are based a lot on their own perceptions and past experiences. He says that it's not possible for anyone to fully know another person, however much they might try, because you will always be bringing your own thoughts, feelings, memories and perspectives into an interaction and the interaction is always limited time wise. But we've got to recognise it goes both ways, we bring our
own perspectives and reactions to a relationship just as much as the other person does.