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i might have bpd

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i might have bpd

Postby hazel22 » Thu Oct 23, 2014 8:58 pm

Hello everyone, I am new to this forum. I have been dealing with anxiety for most of my life. I was diagnosed with many different anxiety disorders. I came across borderline personality disorder , I did not know anything about it.but as I read more about it I started looking back at my life and realized that the patterns in my life matched perfectly of those for bpd. I have never been diagnosed with bpd but I think I may have it. Every time I go to a new therapist I am never 100 percent of my symptoms honest because I am scared. What do I do?
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Re: i might have bpd

Postby salted lipstick » Fri Oct 24, 2014 1:22 am

Yeah it can be hard to be upfront about your symptoms with a new therapist. There are lots of fears and insecurities that make it hard to talk honestly about what is going on with symptoms.

I had this trouble too when I first went to one of my previous therapists. I knew that I wasn't going to be very effective at sharing my symptoms so I instead wrote a letter with what I was comfortable with sharing and handed it to him in the appointment. This meant that I couldn't back out of sharing with him what I wanted to say if I got apprehensive about talking about it at the appointment. It also meant that I couldn't selectively "forget" my symptoms as I was in the appointment and needing to share about it.

So maybe writing a list of the symptoms you are experiencing or writing a letter or something like that can help you to be able to say the details you feel you need to share? It is important to try to share what you are experiencing so that you can get the right type of help, support and treatment that you might need.
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Re: i might have bpd

Postby jaus tail » Fri Oct 24, 2014 6:26 am

Welcome to the forum...

I try not to label my challenges as bpd. Fighting the symptoms helps me a lot, it's also easier than fighting the label.

It can be difficult going to a therapist. I cancelled my appointment with a psychiatrist cause i was scared.

About anxiety...we all have anxiety. Some people get anxious before a flight, some get anxious when they see a spider, some get anxious when watching a football game.

What helps me is realizing where i get anxious...With me it was the people. Surrounding yourself with people who bring out the best in you is very helpful. If you feel anxious in a situation, identify and stay away from it. Its loyalty towards yourself.

Going on long walks, eating fruits and less spicy stuff, not doing any formality with friends helped me a lot.
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Re: i might have bpd

Postby Rainbow191292 » Fri Oct 24, 2014 8:48 am

It might be hard discussing your concerns with your therapist but at the end of the day they are there to help you. Remember that.
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Re: i might have bpd

Postby star dust » Sat Oct 25, 2014 3:57 pm

I am also currently in the 'might have bpd' category. I know you're not supposed to self-diagnose but I am so sure. Nearly all the criteria for BPD are problems that are having a major impact on my life and have done for a very long time. So even if not ever officially diagnosed, I relate to people on here and just reading other' posts helps me sooooo much not to feel alone.

For years I wouldn't see a doctor or anyone, I was also too scared. Scared of having to truly acknowledge that I had problems, scared to talk about things, but also scared that I wouldn't be listened to and that they would think I was a stupid kid who was just a bit down.

I tried for the first time at the the age of 18. But because I wasn't honest with them completely, they didn't take me seriously and my fear that they would just treat me like I was a silly little girl came true. I tried a couple of times after that but never ended up following anything through. This year, I decided that I was going to see it through and try, and just let them do and think whatever they wanted to. Because I've been suffering for too long and you should do the same. Because at the end of the day, nothing will get any worse, it can only get better.

I have to say, I am a person (and I don't think I'm alone in this) that finds and always has found it very difficult to believe that I will ever be able to get better, or that anyone will ever really understand or be able to help me at all. But after all this time of suffering I'm at the point where I feel, even if nothing changes in my situation, at least I have tried. I'm having monthly sessions with a counsellor and waiting to see a psychologist currently.

You said that you're scared to tell them your symptoms. What are you scared of? Because the thing is, as I said, no matter what happens it can't really get any worse. It can only get better. I know that when you are suffering with anxiety that's a lot easier said than done but really, you don't have anything to lose. I also think what salted lipstick said about writing down all your symptoms and everything you are experiencing is a really good idea. I did that when I first went to talk about bpd too. If I didn't I probably would have just chickened out again.
Good luck to you :) and sorry my reply was so long winded lol
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