What are you like when you are drunk?

I was very interested to see what others would say because I had to stop (almost entirely) drinking when I go out because it shuts OFF my sexual inhibition and I tend to make out with... Anyone I'm even moderately attracted to. I've also slept with a lot of my exes while very drunk and not remembered it the next day... I either get the attention I crave and it turns sexual, or I tend to become very morose and sometimes suicidal... Or else I go to bed because I know what's Going to happen otherwise. I hate it, and actually all my suicide attempts have been while drunk. I've also thrown myself over a railing more than once while drunk- it wasn't high enough so I limped back up and did it again. I don't drink when I'm feeling that low any more- I smoke now and that tends to calm me down.

ComplexPerson wrote:*Trigger Warning*

I become euphoric at first, but then crash down and become extremely violent or suicidal on occasions.

I have committed serious crimes of violence when drunk (again people and animals), and tortured/killed a lot of animals during rages.

Never been arrested when sober. Arrested around 30 times when drunk.

I am still not ALLOWED to drink due to strict conditions, but I still do and use other drugs, although generally more moderately than I once did.

Sounds like you belong in the AsPD forum.

Alcohol has a negative affect on me as well, but I would never hurt an animal. I drink alone, so there isn't much chance of violence.

At first I get super happy and start hugging everyone around me, telling them how much I love them. Then I start crashing down. suicidal, insecure, anxious.

Socially drunk -- outgoing, funny, flirty, open. I never, ever am a sloppy drunk.

Drunk alone -- That's when things get ugly. The mind is a terrible place to wander around when I'm drunk and alone. I get paranoid, hyper-emotional and unstable. Maudlin and depressed. I tend to start interacting and saying things I deeply regret the next day.

The drinking, I've found, does not help my condition at all. Hence, moratorium on the booze for a couple of weeks now. I certainly feel more stable without, although some nights it is so hard not to reach for the old friend.

alchool amplifies my moods and emotions so i can be anything between elated to suicidal. actually i should talk in the past tense as i have stopped abusing it almost 10 years ago. now i only occasionally drink, mostly alone at night during crisis time, to knock myself out and sleep. lately i have had some small relapses and got kind of tipsy in public which resulted in me turning into dancing queen mode at a street festival. i was totally dissociated and just danced and danced (i've got some pretty kinky moves). Trouble is I was the only person dancing and the town is small and conservative and when i actually opened my eyes i saw my colleagues and neighbors looking in disbelief….felt like crap for two days after that and then decided that they were wrong by not dancing. i feel in a cage.

alcohol has been a devastating companion to me between age 12 ( ) and 27. I could binge for days, most often taking drugs (whatever available, in any quantity) just not to miss out on things. During binges anything could happen. Some funny memories and good times, but mostly, it has been a long horrible chain of disasters. I am talking abuse, violence (as a victim), hospitals, suicide attempts, recklessness, despair, black outs, hospitals. horror. sheer horror.

to make things worst, my alcohol and substance abuse (axis I diagnosis) determined that my insurance would not cover treatment for my BPD (axis II) as the insurance considered the abuse as a self inflected "chosen" act and not a consequence (part) of BPD. Horrible people.

anyway, that is the past. alcohol … mmmmmmmmmmm……..

When I'm drunk I usually just get sleepy I want to end the whole party and all of my thoughts focus on finding a place (not necessary bed, bath or chair would do) to sleep.

But sometimes, when I don't fall asleep, I just get talkative and friendly. I usually find one person that's in my drunk mind is perfect for being alcoholic friend for talking. The problem is that even though it can be a person that I don't know well (friends' friend or something) - I feel like I need to be totally open. So I go on and tell him ALL my secrets. The next day is always a total moral hangover. I'm always asking myself "have I really told them THIS?". Quite shameful.

When I'm drunk I always change my sexual orientation - boys could not exist, I'm in love with every woman.

And, rarely, when I'm border or have got pissed off before the drinking starts - I can go into aggressive mode and try to start fights.