margharris wrote:This is just so sick. You have a doubting disorder. It has attached to your appearance so you doubt all of it. You don't recognize the doubt because it is well hidden behind all the stories you have created. Your stories try and explain your level of concern. You are just looking for certainty. You have identified flaws but in reality the flaw resides in your brain. You can't see that so you find something tangible to project the doubt and concern on. You look in the mirror to see it. We all have imperfections that we have to tolerate. A BDDer believes they can be in control of how they look. They believe that a surgeon can give them the look they see in their minds eye. They don't have to learn tolerance at all. That is just for suckers and weaklings.
But plastic surgery is a brutal business. We either don't notice the result or believe it is botched. So shortly after the procedure, you will notice your doubting brain fires up. It will hone in on some insignificant detail. Maybe that is a flaw. You go searching for it again. Yes, it is still there. Tomorrow that is all you see. Devastation. You react with catastrophe. It is botched. And your doubting brain has succeeded in ruining your life again.
If you havent properly sort treatment to address your BDD as a doubting, fear stories,catastrophic panic reaction then you haven't really dealt with it at all. It is still there. No surgery can fix that.
Marg
Theres two components tonmy specific bdd
1) obsessive thoughts that cause anxiety/distress
2) breaking down when I look in the mirror.
I dont expect surgery to fix component 1. I will seek treatment and medication for that, but components 2 MUST be surgically fixed...I cant go the rest of my life never looking in a mirror or breaking down when I do.