i started taking participation on the research yesterday. it doesn't require to write a journal, so i'll keep blogging here. i just have to fill some likert scales and describe my feelings in detail. boring, but reminds me of cognitive therapy too much. i took cognitive therapy lessons in college, but that never seemes very good for me. anyway, the money is great.
i hade like 3 hours sleep from yesterday to today. i had to wake up at a decent time in order to go to mass. i really love goint to mass and i see it as a model for the way i wanted my life to be. not only impactantly beautiful, but also restful due to safe morals and intelectually and symbolically rich. i've just finished lunch, i'm going to wait a while and practice music for at least 90 minutes. for the first time since tuesday. last week i couldn't go to my regular church and i believe that might be related to my feeling not so well last week. it really fills me up with the fertility and the vitality of the holy spirit. i was thinking this morning that as much as i've suffered these recent times it really made my faith strong - i am much more certain that solely in it i can find any happiness. i've never talked about this, but converting to catholicism has been a huge part of fighting against my addiction.
sometimes it bothers me to write in english. i have but a vague idea regarding the use of in-on-at and sometimes i write things that sound really funny when i read them a second time. it would be nice if i had some grammar lessons. i was like 11 the last time i went to english class.