On Sundays a student group show movies at school - it's as big and good as a movie theatre, except for the seats, and the price is less than a quarter of any normal theatre. I used to go every Sunday. I always sat next to this guy I know, but he is almost at asocial as I am so we didn't interact too much. We came first of all and got the best seats in the house. A weekly ritual.

Last year I worked on a huge project, in the end I no longer had time to go to these movies because we often worked all the weekend. Since the project ended and I got back home after Christmas I have hardly left the apartment. (So... that would be three and a half month of isolation.)

I have always thought it was hard to go to those movies on Sundays. Not because I was afraid of anything, not because it was physically hard to get there (when there is no snow storm); I rather like it. The problem is that the longer I am isolated, the less I miss other things. The more I can't stand other people. It takes just that single Saturday of aloneness to make it hard for me to get to the movies on Sunday.

I have decided to go to the movies tonight. They are showing a film I have on my "to see" list and I have three pre-paid tickets in my wallet (they must be used before the summer). But that Saturday of aloneness has turned into three and a half months of aloneness.

It's going to be hard to convince myself that it is worth the effort. This is me preparing myself mentally for going tonight (in about eight hours). I sincerely doubt that it will happen, but I'll give it a shot.