1. What is your best quality?
2. What is your worst quality?
3. Where do you see yourself in 7 years?
4. If you were given the chance to integrate, would you? Why or why not?
5. What is your dream job?
6. What is your opinion on sex/relationships.
7. Do you have any regrets?
8. What is one thing about the other alters that bugs you.
9. Anything you'd like to add?
1. I honestly think its my skittishness. I have never known anyone I didn't trust immediately, and it has helped me make it this far. It also is a great judge of character, I have yet to meet someone who knew me from Nic's DID and say something along the lines of "Aw, he's nervous. Isn't that cute?".
2. It would have to be my fear. I think some people know I was the one behind the great AIDS scare of early 2011. And I really did not mean to cause as much damage as I did, but, again, it does suit me well. I think my fear is a tool of sanity for the other guys, because it gives them pause. But I did take it too far that one time, and I am sorry.
3. In 7 years? I really do not know. C. said something about being an improvisor and not really caring what is coming, well, I would like to know right off the bat that we will still be alive in 7 years. So I guess thats my answer: In 7 years, I hope we will still be alive.
4. Its a very scary thought, one I don't really want to think about for long, but for now, I will. A great man on these forums, Johnny-Jack, helped me get past my fear of exterminitation, which still freaks me out a little, so I would rather not go into detail here, but the basics of it are that I am constantly afraid of death. And integration really is just me dying. Thats all it is. Its like my own personal self destruct button, and when I think about it like that, it reminds me of this one lady on Deal or No Deal several years back who kept nervously asking Howie Mandel to keep the plastic case over the red "End the Game" button, because she was afraid to push it. And so I like to think that Nic would never integrate, but one day some deal may come along, and he might push the button. And then we'll all be gone forever. And that is why its a very scary thought, because then I won't be able to contribute to humanity at all. And I want to. But its too scary.
5.Typography and fonts are kind of a passion of mine. I sort of "Get high" whenever I see Helvetica font, specifically the letter "e". Lower case "e" Helvetica just makes me feel great, because its so perfect to me. I love it. So getting a job as some kind of graphic designer with an emphasis on typography would be it for me. And when I say graphic design, I mean just the fonts, not like designing posters or anything like that, not unless it was essential to my job.
6. I dislike them very much. The reason being is that sex is not something I have ever been good at handling on my own. C. blames it on me being raped, but I blame it more on C. to be perfectly honest. He was in this relationship built totally on sex, and now he refuses to be in any relationship at all because of how abruptly it ended. I am for being in a relationship, but I am truly turned off by the women that Nic attends school & college with. They aren't very bright. And I'm not as extreme as C. on hating them, but I do wish the girls my age would wise up a little. Until then, I dislike the concept of both very much. Actually, scratch that. I hate them. Screw those girls. I really do hate them. I have never gotten past the fact that these girls ruin everything for everyone else. Be it paperwork or relationships, it seems like its always about money for these women. And until I meet a woman who is truly about the relationship, and not secretly about getting as much cash as possible then darting, I do hate these girls. And I don't use the word Hate that often. God says to love thy neighbor. But these women aren't my neighbors, thank the Lord. Unfortunetly, these girls will never get past just the money, so for me, I may never be in a committed relationship. Oh well. Back to square 1.
7. The AIDS crisis I started after C. began having unprotected sex with our ex for 4-5 months. I am truly sorry to anyone I might have hurt during it. Other than that, no, believe it or not.
8. C. has this tendency to mimic the other alters and say things in a pitch-perfect voice that they wouldn't generally say. And Derrick keeps invading everyone's privacy. Also, David says he is gay, but I don't believe it. He says he was married to a "Madeline" for 25+ years or something along those lines. And people keep complaining about TK snarling and growling and crouching/squatting in public and it being embarrassing, but I haven't seen him do it publically at all. And the few times he's triggered publically, he is really good at quickly growling or snarling, and then going back inside our head, or wherever he goes. Just in and out. So I kind of wish he would get more credit for that. Other than that, I really don't have any complaints.
9. Not really, no. I like these forums, and I like it when the people are nice and help us out, which is often. But there are some times when we get someone who goes out of their way to just be a jerk. And besides girls today, I really hate them. But other than that, I feel like I've gotten everything off my chest.
>>NEXT TIME: Either another personal DID story (cause they seem to be doing pretty damn well) or part 3 of 8, either with TK or David. Or really anyone.
Nic- Core, 190 Comments Viewed 10149 times
C. Nic- Liberal Agnostic, 19
TK- Reformed animalist, 19
Zack- Smart, shy conservative, hedgehog, 21
David- Gay, Middle aged man from Boston, 42
Derrick- Semi-Psychopathic Child, 7 or 9 years old
Brian "God" S.- Silent, only speaks through ASL, 19
J.R.2- Older Brother, mute, 20
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