Wed 22 December
12 days sober
RR 100% (but feeling angry!)
God,
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Amen
Well I feel like over the last week and a half I have done much better in terms of staying calmer. At work I have been staying calmer and even though I didn't doubt how much work there is still to do in terms of recovery, I did think I was on something of a sort of "zen calmness" role. However, last night I was speaking to a family member on the phone and he really wound me up! I tried to stay calm but eventually I cracked and got angry. I have made immediate amends and "cleaned my side of the street". I apologised for getting angry. I didn't get an apology back but that's irrelevant. My side of the slate is clean. However, despite doing this I found it really hard to get to sleep (this happened late on in the evening) and yeah I just was annoyed that it had got my back up so much emotionally. My resolve to stay sober is 100% but obviously I need to keep an awareness of my emotional state because this thing really wound me up last night. Onwards and upwards today, it's a new day after all!