I am hopefully going in the right direction. I have been on my increased meds for a couple of weeks now and whilst things are not good I dont think they are getting worse anymore.
Someone very wise pointed out to me I am likely not actually suicidal rather I want to be looked after. And whilst I am worried about the secondary gain aspect of that I think she is right probably. If I truly wanted to die I would be dead.
This episode has hit me pretty hard and I feel like I have had a rather public meltdown on this forum but I am very grateful for all the support and kindness I have been offered. I really hope normal service will resume shortly.
I hope you are all well.
My availability on the site will be limited until 25/08/20144 Comments Viewed 70931 times
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Obey The Moderator
I think she is very wise too .... you deserve to be looked after cracked you are always thinking of others and making sure they are ok. I don't necessarily think you being looked after for a period of time is a bad thing and you are very very deserving of the support and kidness you have recieved you so willingly offer it to everyone else in their time of need even when you are having a rough time.
I'm glad you feel that things are no longer getting worse and are hopefully going in the right direction.
As always huge hugs to you xxx
A beautiful thing is never perfect
A certain kind of darkness is needed to see the stars
Thank you lonely-girl for being so kind - you are lovely. Huge hugs
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