Flocinocinihilpilification meaning to place a low value on something from Latin. Something my friend seems to be doing with her life atm.
Today has been a bit a nightmare. My friend is an alcoholic who is currently depressed and drinking. Her daughter has had to take over running the house and is only just 16, she is my Goddaughter. She was crying down the phone to me today about how bad things were. My friend's husband seems on the verge of walking out. Yet again she was drunk today.
I spent the day trying to talk some sense into her to reason with her, to bollock her, anything but I just cant get through. I am seeing her all day tom to give her daughter a break. It has got to the point where the family are having to hide the wallet and car keys. This is all clearly not healthy.
I love them all to pieces and i want to help but I just dont know what to do. She is iffy about AA, therapy, calling the alcohol support team and anything else I come up with. I have suggested Al Anon to her husband.
So if anyone has any bright ideas they would be gratefully received. I have mentioned the forum too but she says she is not a computer person.
I have told her that no one can do this for her but herself. That we can support her but she has to put in the hard work. I dont know if it went in one ear and out the other.
Thanks for listening.
"Don't you give up the fight, you can cope. You can be so amazingly strong."6 Comments Viewed 217549 times
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It sounds like a bad situation. I think that someone struggling with alcoholism has to want to make the change in order for it to work out. There isn't much you can do and unfortunately it might have to happen that the person reaches rock bottom ebfore they realize they need to get help and work on it. I wouldn't feel bad. You tried to do the best in helping but you can only offer up the truth that she has to do it for herself.
Also, thank you for responding to my Blog post the other day about my hamster. I just saw someone had responded when I checked my blog.
“Perhaps, as some wit remarked, the best proof that there is Intelligent Life in Outer Space is the fact it hasn't come here. ”
--Arthur C Clarke
Thank you so much. I just fear her rock bottom will be losing her family. Thanks for your help and you are welcome about your hamster, pets are important.
Oh honey, as an alcoholic myself I totally understand your friend's situation.
As terrible as this sound, there was a time my own husband had to hide keys from me. While is definitly not healthy, it is a safetly measure that needs to be implimented for the time being.
Yes, you are right.... she may have to hit bottom before she stops. However there are many cases where it doesn't have to be that way, or at least in the short term.
I have hit rock bottom many times. Once in Vegas I woke up two days later to find that I was wandering in the highway with nothing but bra and panties. A knd strange man picked me up and delivered me home. Another time was a sezuire landing me into the hospital. I even lost a job over it.
My longest sober periods are the ones where options are simply removed from me.
AA is helpful but only if you have the full support of family (no snide comments nor annoyance over dinner being late bec of meetings) AND one finds the right group.
Trust me, even thou the concept of AA is the same everywhere... different groups interact differently and may not always "click" for an alcoholic
On the other hand if your friend lives in the city nearby alcoholic access then that may be tougher. One major reason I moved away from Las Vegas - alcohol is served 24 freakin hours everywhere! Now I live in a very rural country without a car of my own.
Look I am babbling.... why don't u see if your friend wld like to talk directly to me, a struggling alcoholic housewife in any form including email or AIM. It sounds as if she is nearing rock bottom and could use someone who has been through it MANY times and is currently sober since Feb 2011. She may not be a computer person but probably at least check emails or uses instant msgs.
Hang in there!!
[color=#FF40BF]God will Give me nothing i cannot handle--i just wish he didn't trust me so much!
[color=#0000BF]PM me if you wanna talk.[/color][/color]
Thank you so so much, it is really appreciated, I will ask her. Thanks again.
Thanks Debra, hope you are OK.
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