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FreakOfTheDemonDoll
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Mad, bad, or sad?
   Mon Jan 02, 2017 9:28 am
2017: The Last Chance for Therapy
   Sun Jan 01, 2017 9:08 am

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No answers as to why I am, the way I am.

Permanent Linkby FreakOfTheDemonDoll on Fri Jul 24, 2015 2:28 am

Over the years of therapy I have never yet have gotten what the doctor THINKS I feel from their angle.
I've always told myself and only myself, "only I know what I feel and what I am" but the doctors has never told me if they think I feel like this or they always for years now giving me very vague answers like everyone else is getting straight answers so I find it weird how I never got a straight answer of "you can't get along with people because of your EMOTIONS or because you didn't KNOW they were joking or you thought they were LYING to you but that's not true" it's always been just one sided I talk and they listen which makes me now believe I am not messed up as they say.
They don't even tell me or can detect if I'm mentally CAPABLE to socialize again in groups cause for a while now they have been suggesting group therapy and that is a bad idea I tried groups in school and they keep saying "it's gonna be with adults" but I don't get along with anyone everyone is messed up not me forget that.
They think I'm ready but am I really ready? What if I'm not? Then them thinking I was ready means they were wrong.
I have experience with people and I don't wanna socialize because even adults can act like the assholes that were in school I've seen them before.
I really don't care to be a member of society because I can't fit in, to the reason being that literally EVERYONE wants to make fun of every aspect of me, to the point of beliefs of persecution.
I'm not overreacting, I am speaking from years of bad luck with people and life that because I have had so much bad stuff happen to me, I can't put it into words, or if I can, it will just end up with me repeating the words "bad luck so many times it feels so REAL" because it feels so real to me now, the bad I had and have to deal with in my life.
And rude people do not help and honestly the way people see me doesn't help the way I start to see me. (In a negative sense.)
I just feel like people don't think of how their words can affect other people.

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