Hello everyone. Just wanted to share what has been going on with me lately to see if anyone deals with the same issues.
So my wife and I have been together for about 12 years now. We have an awesome relationship, 2 kids, and are still very much in love.
I am usually a very confident and not insecure at all. I have never felt this way before.
But for some reason the past couple months I have been very insecure....like obsessively. Especially when it comes to my relationship with my wife. Like I need constant affection, reassurance, and regular sex(I could literally do it a couple times a day, not in a horny way. Just to feel close to each other)if it is not given to me often I notice and fixate on why she doesn\'t want to. But we do on average a couple times a week, which is great. My days lately pretty much revolve around spending as much time with her as possible....smothering, right? I keep thinking that some day she will leave me because she will have finally had enough of dealing with a bi-polar husband( although I am not that hard to deal with, and sometimes I am extra awesome heh). I guess I have an intense fear of loss lately.
I have even been jealous of her past relationships out of the blue for no reason at all, it never bothered me before at all....These feelings are driving me absolutely crazy, I am not this person at all and I hope it passes. Is this how teenage girls feel? Hah
I am totally open with her and let her know what is happening with me, we both know it is foolish thoughts but it still won\'t go away.
I just wish the obsessive insecure thoughts would stop playing over in my head all day. I have the odd few days where my mind slows down and I am more realistic. But I have been bouncing all over the place lately with my moods.One minute I am crying because I think my wife doesn\'t love me, then I\'ll be irritable, then anxious, then happy.......
Not sure if I am depressed, hypomanic, or just nuts.
Again this is not me, I recognise these feelings are not right.
Does anyone else have this? Bouts of extreme insecurities? I have been tapering up my lamictal to 200mg day...but I am feeling like I might need something to slow down my unquiet mind. I find my self taking Ativan a lot lately just to take the edge off and not "feel" so much.