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Broken mind broken body

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Broken mind broken body

Postby Mike703 » Sun Feb 07, 2016 4:34 am

Good evening,

My name is Mike. I am really having a tough time juggling my mental illness and messed up body. I was in a bad atv accident which has caused weird sensations, a loose feeling in my lower back, stretched ligaments in my neck and nerve pain. In combination I am bipolar so I have suffered three major manic episodes that has left me embarrassed, tired and depressed. I am having a hard time with money and I struggle with sin and drug addiction as well. Being 28 years old I get anxiety about living a long life. I just don't know how I will make it through.

I currently see a psychiatrist and a psychologist and I have tried a Chiropractor, physical therapist and Orthopedic doctor for my back.

I don't know what to do. I want to give up so badly but I am terrified of waking up in Hell.

Any suggestions would be great.
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Re: Broken mind broken body

Postby CloudShark » Sun Feb 07, 2016 1:49 pm

Are you getting enough in the way of pain killers? I had a very painful condition for a few years and it was miserable. Chronic pain doesn't help mental health and it certainly didn't help with mine. I'm very sorry to hear that you're having nerve pain. I know someone with nerve damage and they take cocodamol every day, but it has to be prescription strength.

The other advice is to work at sorting the addiction issues out. That won't be helping you, but you already know that.

As for that embarrassment after a manic episode. Well, time is a healer and we've all been there!

Take your meds, stick to the routine that keeps you well. Easier said than done when you're in a dark place, but it is possible with help. That's all I've got, but hopefully there's something useful in there. Hang in there, at least with bipolar you know that it's episodic and can't last forever.
"Away"
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Re: Broken mind broken body

Postby skilsaw » Sun Feb 07, 2016 10:14 pm

Hi Mike. People don't usually use their real name here. I'm David, but to everyone else, I'm Skilsaw.

I struggled with a terrible perception of myself as sinful and unacceptable to God. The self condemnation was like a heavy grey wet blanket thrown over my body that was a huge and difficult burden to carry that blocked out the sun and robbed me of joy.

Real help came through years of seeing a psychologist. As for thinking you are going to hell, I hate to say this, because I am a Christian, but I would be very careful about seeing a church minister. I have met some very deluded pastors that would only make matters worse. I needed to work out my own view of good and evil. Then after each failure, I had to acknowledge it, put it behind me, and start again. God forgives. Forgive others. Forgive ourselves.

There is lots more going on in your life... chronic pain, bipolar illness, anxiety and money problems.
Stick around. The forum will help you with each problem but it takes time, and ultimately, it is up to you.

I"m interested in what others have to say.
It is not always possible to make someone's discomfort go away.
Sometimes, the best thing we can do is resist the urge to fix it and instead just say, "You, too?"
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Re: Broken mind broken body

Postby CloudShark » Mon Feb 08, 2016 3:11 pm

Come to think of it, I had a lot of thoughts about sin and god during my last episode and I'm not even Christian. I felt it was a spiritual test of some kind. Is this common in bipolar then?
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