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Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

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Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby keenie » Fri Mar 29, 2013 8:47 pm

Hey all.

So I've had a bit of a strange couple of months, hence I've been pretty quiet on here!

First, I quit my job as a bipolar researcher- without another job to go to. I could not stand to be around so many 'experts' who knew so little about the lived experience of bipolar, and who were not keen to learn. It has probably been one of the most frustrating experiences of my life.

Then just a week later, I got married and then had an amazing honeymoon. Then I got back and was offered a job at another university, which I took. I am due to move to another city to take this job up in a few weeks.

Now in theory I have lots to be happy about (and don't get me wrong- I am!); A new job, new husband, new house etc, but I am so wrought with anxieties about my new situation that my mood is really fluctuating quite badly and I have been very low at some points. I hate change. I even freak out when my therapist changes the flowers in her therapy room (literally, it has given me panic attacks!). Now everything is changing and I'm not handling it well.

Does change and uncertainty affect you too? How do you deal with it? I'm trying to grin and bear it but I feel awful :( and am so scared it will make me ill.

Best, keenie
DX: Bipolar Type 1 with psychotic features
Meds: Quetiapine 800mg, Fluoxetine 60mg, Depakote 1500mg, Zopiclone 7.5mg, Diazepam as required.

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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby bepp » Sat Mar 30, 2013 1:05 am

That's a big fat YES. Change throws me into turmoil whether its good or bad change. The best advice I can give is talk yourself through everyday. Tell yourself these are good changes and you just have to ride the wave of uncertainty. Now is a good time to focus on your routines that you can control (ie sleep, exercise, diet, meds,hobbies...anything you can). Soon enough you will settle and enjoy the rewards of mustering the courage of making such big changes. Hopefully, your new husband can help too. Maybe talk to your pdoc for a temporary adjustment in meds to get you through. Just suggestions, I'm no expert, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn last night :wink:

Good luck to you and congratulations! Let us know how you are doing.

PS - and remember you can talk it out here whenever you want
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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby Cheze2 » Sat Mar 30, 2013 1:35 am

Hey keenie!
I've been wondering where you were at. :) All that change does sound exciting, scary, and lots of other emotions that I can't think of to describe right now! I can see how that might throw you off, it would DEFINITELY throw my moods off as well. Heck, I had to call my local crisis line the other night because my yoga class was cancelled. (long story) I agree with Bepp, try to focus on the things that you can control at the moment, and try to create as much of a routine as you can so your body may be able to get into the groove of things and be able to hopefully smooth itself out.
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Currently going through LOTS of med changes. Today's cocktail is: Tegretol 600mg; Quetiapine 200mg; Latuda 80mg; Trilafon: 4mg
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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby janjones » Sat Mar 30, 2013 3:04 pm

I’m glad to see you back posting Keenie! :D

I'm sorry you are feeling awful though. :( Any change (good or bad) can equal stress so it makes sense to me it could have a potential negative effect on you. Those are a lot of big life changes happening at once and would be a lot for anyone. I’m glad you have you new hubby for support, and perhaps talking to him will help, as he is under some of the same stress from the changes that effect you both.

I wish you lots of luck with the move and your new job! :D
Hang in there!
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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby keenie » Sun Mar 31, 2013 7:44 pm

Aww thanks guys, it helps to know that other people struggle with the same sort of thing (even though I wouldn't wish it on anyone!)

I'm doing much better today- as you say, just trying to ride the waves. I keep driving over to the new city to get familiar with it (it's about a 2 hour drive), I've lined a therapist up over there and have started seeing her, got my gym membership sorted etc. We're moving in about a fortnight, so plenty to do to keep busy. I think I'll actually be okay once I get there...it's the anticipation that's killing me :(

Nervous about the new job too and hoping I'll cope and not have any major relapses and time off like I did last year...I felt soooo bad for going off sick for months and dropping them in it. I had taken the job after 5 years of no major relapses and I guess I got a little complacent and just assumed I'd be fine. My new managers don't know about the bipolar but will need to bring it up fairly early on as I will need a bit of flexibility with my hours so I can go to appointments. Not looking forward to that conversation.

Anyways, thanks, it helps to have support :) Awww Cheze, poor you with the yoga! I hate my exercise regime being altered- I went to the gym yesterday to find it closed because it's easter weekend and I felt iffy for the rest of the day! Hope the crisis line were helpful.

Big hugs, keenie
DX: Bipolar Type 1 with psychotic features
Meds: Quetiapine 800mg, Fluoxetine 60mg, Depakote 1500mg, Zopiclone 7.5mg, Diazepam as required.

"Stop the world....I want to get on"
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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby thebetterhalf » Sun Mar 31, 2013 7:57 pm

I dont like change either. It like it ruins everything. It makes my moods unpredictable.
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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby reid87 » Mon Apr 01, 2013 7:05 pm

Just FYI but you should read about the The Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale. It basically says that "stressors" do not have to be terrible things in life and in fact positive and negative life changes will have the same effect on your body.

here is a link to the wiki page with the scale http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and ... ress_scale

It mentions several of your life events (vacation, marriage, job change) all of which are great but high up on the stressor scale. Intense life changes like you are going through are hard on both body and mind so make sure that you take care of yourself!

-- Mon Apr 01, 2013 2:05 pm --

Just FYI but you should read about the The Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale. It basically says that "stressors" do not have to be terrible things in life and in fact positive and negative life changes will have the same effect on your body.

here is a link to the wiki page with the scale http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and ... ress_scale

It mentions several of your life events (vacation, marriage, job change) all of which are great but high up on the stressor scale. Intense life changes like you are going through are hard on both body and mind so make sure that you take care of yourself!
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Re: Uncertainty and change...does it affect your mood?

Postby midwestsuzyq » Fri Apr 05, 2013 9:00 pm

Another big fat YES to this. I got diagnosed with bipolar about 9 months ago, when we realized that my anxiety was coupled with the mania. And since then I've gone through major changes, a move, new job and in the past week, now a recent move from an apt to a house. Some things have been good, some have been bad but I relate to the change so drastically that it scares me sometimes.
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