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White Knight Syndrome

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White Knight Syndrome

Postby Superman23 » Wed Apr 06, 2011 10:33 am

White Knight Syndrome basically means you buy things or do things for the person you love because you don't think they would like you without it. Sort of like rescuing the damsel in distress so she'll fall in love with you. As a result you usually get treated like a doormat and used by the other person and lose something (money for example).

I'm guessing this is pretty common with people who are avoidant because of low self esteem. Watch out for internet dating websites, especially with people asking for money from you so you can meet or "be together". They prey on people who have this problem.

Take the test to see if you have it:

http://tests.matchdoctor.com/1086/The_White_Knight_Syndrome_Test.html

Here's a website that describes it better:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-white-knight-syndrome
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Re: White Knight Syndrome

Postby techaddict » Wed Apr 06, 2011 1:58 pm

Superman23 wrote:White Knight Syndrome basically means you buy things or do things for the person you love because you don't think they would like you without it. Sort of like rescuing the damsel in distress so she'll fall in love with you. As a result you usually get treated like a doormat and used by the other person and lose something (money for example).

I'm guessing this is pretty common with people who are avoidant because of low self esteem. Watch out for internet dating websites, especially with people asking for money from you so you can meet or "be together". They prey on people who have this problem.

Take the test to see if you have it:

http://tests.matchdoctor.com/1086/The_White_Knight_Syndrome_Test.html

Here's a website that describes it better:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-white-knight-syndrome
Just follow my adventures in the dating websites thread on here with that supposed English teacher in China if you want to see an example of what this kind of predatory practice looks like and give you an idea of the warning signs. This person was asking me to send $750 to help her cover her flight ticket and I said no, explaining that I'm not comfortable giving money to anyone I haven't even met in person given all the scams going on. And then I never heard from her again. That scenario had nothing to do with White Knight Syndrome though.

I do have the tendency to want to rescue the damsels in distress. Do I think it's because they wouldn't like me otherwise? Well honestly I don't think a potential romantic interest could fully appreciate me until she sees my softer, gentle, empathetic side. I am good looking but my social skills are rather poor (I was able to have 2-3 hour conversations with my ex-girlfriend recently. Nowadays our conversations are a lot shorter because I run out of things to talk about. But basically my social skills aren't as bad as I think they are) and my life is pretty bland compared to the vast majority of the population. And while I can be funny, you have to be able to appreciate my brand of humor to find me funny. Personally I don't see anything wrong with a girl liking me for some of my best qualities (compassion, empathy, thoughtfulness, being a good listener, etc.) That doesn't mean I'm going to be her sugar daddy or allow myself to be a doormat for her.
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Re: White Knight Syndrome

Postby Quests » Wed Apr 13, 2011 11:08 pm

I have never been in a relationship, but the closest I ever can get to one has always included girls who had a lot of issues. Whether it be low self esteem, abusive ex, or family problems. I don't drink alcohol, smoke, or do any drugs; but the girls that usually stick around me long enough all seem to do one of the other and sometimes all three. Healthy women who have a lot going for them or least is some what stable, seem to avoid me like the plague. Which in the end might be all for the best, as I would hate to be a burden that crashes the world of some one on the right track. They deserve better then that.
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