Physically cannot speak... how to get over this?

This only happens when I decide to try and talk to a hot girl/woman in non-social situations (grocery store, just passing on the street, etc.). I get so nervous, that my throat kind of clenches shut and I can't talk without clearing my throat... or I try to talk and no sound comes out (just air).

How have any of you gotten over this?

Mind you this isn't a problem in most cases. For instance, if she talks to me first, I'm usually fine as far as actually speaking goes (nevermind the content of what I say ).

If a woman like that talks to me my insticnt is to run. I can't even look at her. It's a major bummer. But I have managed to overcome it at times. Once I was in a bookstore and a hot woman smiled at me. I waited a few minutes then said something about it being a good day to book shop. She didn't say anything. The next thing I know she was gone. Looks like I scared her off. I'm the BOOGIE MAN!!!

That´s confirm my theory that we mainly avoid the people we desire or admire and we want to amulate. I think is a narcissit trail. I rise my hand up, too. It´s a way to protect our hurt Ego. Sometimes, we are our own enemies. We are perfect machines of self- savotage!
How to cope with this? I don´t know, my friend. I suppouse that accepting and loving ourselves. Loving even our imperfections. This is easy to say.

try and be comftable and smile(proper one not a half assed uncomftable one) and if they are nice they will probably do it back to ya. thats a good starting point i reckon.

You can't really talk to a hot woman if she doesn't give you any indication that she wants to talk. You have to realize that beautiful woman have guys bother them all the time. Try putting up a pic of a hotie on a popular dating site. You won't be able to keep up with all the messages!

Parador wrote:You can't really talk to a hot woman if she doesn't give you any indication that she wants to talk. You have to realize that beautiful woman have guys bother them all the time. Try putting up a pic of a hotie on a popular dating site. You won't be able to keep up with all the messages!

and what if she is thinking the same thing as you? then nothing will happen. if you can be the person who is open and compassionate then you are in a better position than if you are waiting for the other person to do it. if they are a nice person and they like you then they will give you the same treatment back and if not then they probably arnt very nice or could be in a bad mood or just arnt worth knowing anyway..

i dont think its just hot girls i think all girls get alot of attention from guys, ive seen a few girls who are stuck up their own arses who were pretty ugly and ive seen some girls who look like models who are really nice and freindly and probably like other people who are the same.

ultimate_krang wrote:and what if she is thinking the same thing as you? then nothing will happen. if you can be the person who is open and compassionate then you are in a better position than if you are waiting for the other person to do it. if they are a nice person and they like you then they will give you the same treatment back and if not then they probably arnt very nice or could be in a bad mood or just arnt worth knowing anyway..

i dont think its just hot girls i think all girls get alot of attention from guys, ive seen a few girls who are stuck up their own arses who were pretty ugly and ive seen some girls who look like models who are really nice and freindly and probably like other people who are the same.

Just think how annoying it would be to have total strangers trying to start conversations with you everywhere. If a woman doesn't at least make some eye contact with a guy and smile she is just not interested in talking to a guy.

hmm, sounds like you are really being shy more then anything....

Are you worried that they would not respond, or like you ?

Some hot girls don't get hardly any guys talk to them because they can come off as intimidating or look too good to be single.

Parador wrote:Just think how annoying it would be to have total strangers trying to start conversations with you everywhere. If a woman doesn't at least make some eye contact with a guy and smile she is just not interested in talking to a guy.

i dont find random people making conversation annoying... it can be embaressing but thats me im sure decent normal people are fine. eye contact is a pretty normal thing most people do when they talk to each other.. i guesse that makes sense that if someone doesnt make eye contact , unless they are shy then they may not be interested in talking with them.