Our partner

Friend just totally blobked me out - what him back

Asperger's Syndrome message board, open discussion, and online support group.

Re: Friend just totally blocked me out - what him back

Postby MissJones » Sat Sep 06, 2014 2:55 pm

Hello, it's been over a month since my last post and still no contact I have seen him in ths office four times in the last two weeks and he looks scared and doesnt speak. To be honest I wrote a rwally long message expalining each encounter which would explain more about his behaviours but I st it twice upon submisdion lnd dont think my head or heart can deal with writing them again. Maybe it is a blessing as they did ramble on. So in a nutshell tried extreme mesaures not to bump into him since my last post to give him the isolation from m as he asked to cool the interation as our relationship was getting too much for him and he friends had tokd him not to kead me on and starting dating. They have never meet me and dont know what I look like but think I am too old - yes I am older but people say I look much much younger and he looks older so it isnt an issue and anyway his friends havent sen us together so thyey dont kniw how happy he looks when he us with me. I digress, so in all but one of tge encounters it wad an accident I was near him. Duing one I asked if he wax goung to speak to me soon and he said I am, another we was in tge car park and he exited against the arrows just so not to oass my car - this ruke breaking just have freaked him out, the next time ge gsd a meeing near my desk he just starred and dudnt wave or say hello but whilst he was in his meeting (glass walls throughout our building) he saw me with a
Male friend who he diesnt like me being with, in the meeting room I saw him cover his etes when he saw us tgen he left the meeting at least 30 mins before the end and the final encounter was planned as my femake friend cgecjed wgere he had a meeting so ge had to walk passed us, she said gello but he ignored her as she was with me. Within 5 mins of him going to his meeting he appeared on tge stairs near wgere we were standing walked passed looked at me and continued on. We assumed ge gad firgiten oaperr but she said ge was just standing in our lobby just staring, then he walked back passed looked direct at me and went back to his meeting. I sent a email that afternoon with a shirt hello in the messafe bar as he wont open my messages but thus is the one place he cant block me - as I am worried he might now think I am ignoring him. Obviouly no response but it miggt have been a coincidence but my mobile rang I said hello but no one answered. This has happened a few times recently.

Any ideas about his behaviour, the men I work with say I should forget him as he is ignorant and cruel and I shoukd just go out and get a man as I could have my pick of most. Thats sounds fine but I dont do relationships very well only a few men in my life and tge kast one I had lst years but it was loveless as ge saud I was a perfect houswife but a control freak and didnt like intimacy enough. So ne and my friend are to like souls. My femake friends say I need a real man and whikst he is good looking he is a heartless user and I could do so much better. They dont underssand what a wonderful man he was to me and that we both have our issues and thats why we were so happy together. My boss even said we are the good looking undateables. All I want is him back in my life how do we get talking again?
Thanks for caring and reading my rambling, it hard to type when your crying. My others close friend is dying of kung cancer at the moment so I am feeling lonly and lost.
Boy oh boy I know hiw to pick them
MissJones
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2014 9:04 pm
Local time: Thu Mar 28, 2024 7:49 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: Friend just totally blobked me out - what him back

Postby shock_the_monkey » Sun Sep 07, 2014 12:11 am

you need to give priority to your other friend who is dying of lung cancer, as time lost now you'll not be able to regain later.

as to your friend, if you were a man and he were a woman, my advice to you would be very simple indeed: back off. women can be very apt at playing the 'sexual harassment' card. and, if all things were equal, you'd be very close to crossing that line. however, they're not. men are far more tolerant of such things than women. that said, the work place is no place for such things. so, whatever you do, take it outside of work.

and the other thing is that when people say one thing and do another, it's what they do that counts. and in terms of actions, he's making it very clear to you that he's not interested. why that might be really is anyone's guess. it might well be peer pressure. but you've really no control over that.

so, my advice to you is to stop trying to avoid him and stop trying to create situations to encounter him too. in fact, stop treating him any differently to anyone else. and there are a couple of reasons for this. it's creating an awkward atmosphere. also, should he ever wish to re-connect with you, it means that in the normal course of events there will be opportunities for him to do so.

but, in essence, i think that your friends and colleagues have got this situation about right. it mightn't be what you want to hear but any relationship has to be mutual and this currently isn't. and you'd be best off remaining open to any other opportunities that might come your way that are.
something knocked me out' the trees
now i'm on my knees
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

there is one thing you must be sure of
i can't take any more
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

don't like it but i guess i'm learning

... shock the monkey to life
shock_the_monkey
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 4974
Joined: Tue Jan 15, 2008 10:36 pm
Local time: Thu Mar 28, 2024 8:49 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Previous

Return to Asperger's Syndrome Forum




  • Related articles
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 12 guests