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I think I'm a psychopath..?

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I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby h0llyyx » Wed Apr 20, 2011 9:08 pm

I'm a young girl and ever since I can remember I've been manipulative and horrible to get what I want. If I want something, I won't stop at anything to get it. I experience anger and rage inside me when someone tells me I can't do something, and I kick off and get aggressive towards my parents. For example, if my mum tells me I can't go out somewhere, I'll kick off until she gives in. I've threatened to kill myself in the past to manipulate my parents into things.
I lie about everything and anything. It's just compulsive - even tiny things, if someone asked what I had for my tea I might say 'pizza' instead of 'pasta' just because I can lie about it. I've lied about huge things, that I know normal people would feel guilty about lying about but I don't. I can't really attach myself to anyone and I can't commit and I can't make plans.
It's like something inside me takes over when I feel I've been mistreated - when my ex got a new girlfriend, I told him that unless he broke up with her I was going to report him for rape (completely untrue) and when he told people I said that, I started crying and lying about it and manipulating everyone around me to get them to believe me.
I'm really impulsive about everything, I'm sexually promiscuous and I don't care about the consequences of anything I do. Sometimes I feel a bit guilty but I very rarely manage to sincerely apologise, however I do get very 'high' moods where I'll apologise for being a nasty little cow just because I'm so happy - purely self-centered reasons.
I don't really care about what anyone thinks about me, but I'm constantly seeking approval. I know you all probably think I'm a vile human being but I'm actually quite scared of what I'm capable of.. I don't know where I'm going to stop with this as it's all getting very out of control now, involving drugs etc.
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby Chucky » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:15 pm

I'm not so sure that you're the horrible human being that you think you are, nor am I sure that your situation is entirely hopeless (i.e. there is hope). In my view, a good idea would be to first see your life as being in the 'fast lane' currently. You're snappy and make decisions rapidly ... but what you must do is slow your life down a few notches. If you slow down the pace of your life, then you could spend more time thinkign about decisions that you are going to make. Try to 'arrest' the first thought that comes to your mind, process it, and then decide if it's positive or negative to act on it. If negative, then think of something positive.

That's all I have to say. Others will have more I'm sure.

take care
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby Myers » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:29 pm

h0llyyx wrote:I don't really care about what anyone thinks about me, but I'm constantly seeking approval. ... I'm actually quite scared of what I'm capable of.. I don't know where I'm going to stop with this as it's all getting very out of control now, involving drugs etc.


I don't think you're a psychopath.
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby Barlakopofai » Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:34 pm

Edited due to unhelpful content and 'misplaced' language.
Noticed how cruel my online name is?
No english person knows how to pronounce it
Other people try to say it in english
And suddenly, mod preview
One, If quoting Scrubs is illegal now, then I don't wanna live on this forum anymore
If you are ######6 with my pic, look at it before doing so... It tells the future
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby ohbuchanan » Thu Apr 21, 2011 12:57 am

The first thing I thought of

borderline-personality/topic5797.html
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby face » Thu Apr 21, 2011 4:19 am

h0llyyx wrote:I don't really care about what anyone thinks about me, but I'm constantly seeking approval.

ummm... what? :shock:
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby slither » Thu Apr 21, 2011 5:04 am

Murderface wrote:
h0llyyx wrote:I don't really care about what anyone thinks about me, but I'm constantly seeking approval.

ummm... what? :shock:
If you do a little research, psychopaths tend to contradict themselves alot.
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby Steve-o » Thu Apr 21, 2011 5:30 am

Hm... rage, compulsive lying, suicide threats, attachment problems, manipulative, jealous, possessive, insecure, and unstable. Nice list. I vote borderline...

or, maybe you just need to lay off the drugs.

slither wrote:If you do a little research, psychopaths tend to contradict themselves alot.

If by "psychopath" you mean people who are bad liars, have mood instability, or are confused w/ faulty introspects, then sure.
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby Anticare » Thu Apr 21, 2011 8:42 am

I seriously could not help myself from visualizing a screaming child when you mentioned the scenario with the parents. You're not very subtly are you?... Anyway, all i see is borderline but only because you seem suicidal and so dramatic.
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Re: I think I'm a psychopath..?

Postby Simon Attwood » Thu Apr 21, 2011 8:56 am

A bit of old stuff;

“A traumatic complex brings about dissociation of the psyche. The complex is not under control of the will and for this reason it possesses the quality of psychic autonomy. This autonomy consists in it’s power to manifest itself independently of the will and even in direct opposition to conscious tendencies; it forces itself tyrannically upon the conscious mind. The explosion of affect is a complete invasion of the individual; it pounces upon him/her like an enemy or a wild animal.”

Jung.


Jung was almost right here, but this pouncing isn’t “like” a wild animal, it IS a wild animal, it is the wild animal in our heads, the amygdala, as it rises in response to perceived threat or danger, it becomes the dominant force in the mind. The need for psychic protection becomes it’s own autonomous personality, the power switches from our advanced prefrontal cortext to our primitive amygdala, the personality adapts to suit, accepting this new captain while it rides out the stormy sea.

Of course, Jung later acknowledged this in the quote;
“Taking it in its deepest sense, the shadow is the invisible saurian tail that man still drags behind him.”


In other words, evidence of our phylogeny; a left over from our primitive animal ancestry, although it’s less a tail, or an appendix, but rather a structure right at the core of our brain.


And something a bit more recent;

“Stress can exacerbate a number of psychiatric disorders, many of which are associated with the prefrontal cortex, the area of the brain unique to humans. A Yale University study looked at the effects of noise stress on brain function in monkeys. Results indicate that stress impairs Prefrontal Cortex cognitive function through its influence on dopamine, a key neurotransmitter that’s involved in many brain disorders, including ADHD and Parkinson’s disease.

The researchers think that “stress may take the Prefrontal Cortex ‘off-line’ to allow more habitual responses . . . to regulate behaviour. This mechanism may have survival value, but may often be maladaptive in human society, contributing to the vulnerability of the Prefrontal Cortex in many neuropsychiatric disorders”


http://archpsyc.ama-assn.org/cgi/reprint/55/4/362

The amygdala is regulated by an area of the brain in the orbitofrontal cortex and there are direct pathways between them. Current research in developmental neuropsychology hypothesises that for some individuals, possibly involving early developmental trauma, this pathway, and the development of the anterior cingulate fail to develop full function. The more we have a tendency to “kick off” the more it reveals dysregulation of the amygdala. The calmer and more “in control” we are, especially in times of stress, the more regulated our amygdala.

Essentially, when you are not happy, then you are in a state of stress, or fear, and your autonomous nervous system takes the helm of you, often referred to as an “amygdala hijack”.

And no, you are not a psychopath, because a psychopath would never say “I think I am a psychopath”.
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"From the highest person to the lowest person, self-development must be deemed the root of all, by every person. If this root is neglected, what grows from it cannot be well-ordered." Confucius
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