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Psychopathy?

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Psychopathy?

Postby jawhn » Thu Feb 11, 2010 8:40 pm

I'm not sure where to post this so I'll just do it here, move if it's in the wrong place. Anyway, I'm 18 years old and I'm male. I primarily speak dutch, so bare with my english. I know it's not bad, but I sometimes make mistakes.

Okay, so, the other day I was watching a House episode where they treated a psychopathic patient. Early on with that they were saying I realized I had some traits the patient had. I googled Psychopathy and read an article (http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/display ... 0168/55051) and the wikipedia page. Is it possible I suffer from it? I just want to know out of curiosity, not that it would really bother me cause it's just a name for my personality, I feel like I'm sane.

The idea of killing someone never bothered me the least, except if it were my family or my friends cause I care about them. But I could honestly kill a person without any guilt following, but only if I knew I'd be safe cause my freedom is important to me. I wanna be able to do what I want. Although, I don't have the urge to kill someone though, it just wouldn't be a problem for me morally. What makes me doubt psychopathy is cause I DO care if I get in trouble, I don't like obstacles.

I'm not sure I get what empathy really means, but i can almost never sympathize for others I don't care about. I couldn't care less about the people dying in war or the haitians and stuff. I know I should, but I don't. Crying people or when people tell me their problems makes me uncomfortable, cause I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do. I don't feel bad, I just feel awkward.

I'm very manipulative sometimes. A good example would be how I got with one of my ex boyfriends. He was a really good friend of mine and I liked him a lot, so I used to lie about tragic stuff happening and pretend to be suicidal so he'd spend more time with me and trying to make me happy. Which he did. Then after a while I started to get the feeling he liked me, but he was so closeted. I then made a fake name on some website he plays games on and befriended him with that fake name. I used this allias to get everything out of him and I used this to manipulate him to do anything I wanted (along with the "depression" i had). I dumped him when I no longer liked him. I knew this was wrong all along, but I honestly never felt guilty or bad or something.

I lie a lot too, mostly about stuff that's unimportant, but I just do it. Not sure why. Other times it's more serious though; I remember there was this guy once who was obsessed with Yu-Gi-Oh, he was in my class, and I used to lie to him I had these cards he was looking for. I told him to pay, and I'd bring them the next day. Weeks passed and I knew he was failing, so I knew after the summer I wouldn't see him ever again. I got maybe 300 dollars out of him. (You're not allowed to fail at my school, I have the dutch system). I never felt any kind of remorse about this either.

I wouldn't say I've had trouble with the law, I mean, I never pick fights or something. I do have a job I do every year to earn money. It's only 5 days working at a place that sells fireworks for the new years. At that job I stole around $1200 this year, I did it the past years too, only less. Other than that, nothing against the law. I used to skip school a lot and not do anything and I got held back cause of it, but now school isn't a problem anymore, i'm actually doing so good that I may be the best graduated this year. I do still skip classes sometimes, but everyone does that.

Also about my childhood, I used to kill animals (cats, lizards, chicks) when I was little for fun. My parents told me about the different cats, but I honestly can only remember the chicks. I don't do that anymore, in fact I have a pet cat. It used to freak my parents out, apparently. And I had a wetting the bed problem til I was like 13. I used to set fires for fun too, but not with the intention to burn the house down or something, me and my cousin just liked to watch different stuff burn.

What makes me doubt psychopathy is I do care about my friends and family, and I WOULD be sad if they died or if they lost a leg or something. And I DO feel happy and sad and angry and different emotions. I'm very talkative and humorous with my friends. And I'm easily bored, but I don't feel the need to do risky activities like psychopaths apparently do.

Anyway, I feel like I've typed enough. Ask me anything else if you wish, except my name and what not. I don't care if I do have it, but I don't want people knowing either. So what is it? Psychopathy? anti-social? narcissistic and selfish? amoral? or perfectly normal?
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby insincerity » Thu Feb 11, 2010 10:21 pm

What precisely bothers you about killing your family?
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby jawhn » Thu Feb 11, 2010 10:34 pm

I like them, except my dad, and I feel like I need them. I mean, where would I live? I can't support myself now and even so, I care about them. I'm sure that rules out psychopathy, but the article i posted stated otherwise. i'm just curious, it doesn't actually matter
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby gio » Thu Feb 11, 2010 10:41 pm

You are definitely not a psychopath. Don't worry about it. You could possible have antisocial personality disorder (I don't think so) but you are not a psychopath and it is likely you can be treated if you do have anything at all.

How do I know? Well, first pretty much everyone who comes here wondering if they are one, are not. If you worry about it enough to ask, well, then you aren't. Real psychopaths know they are different and they don't care about it and it doesn't bother them. The fact that you care that you might be one shows that you are lacking the emotions and ability to self-reflect that psychopaths tend to lack.

Furthermore, you mentioned that you care about your family. A psychopath wouldn't care about his family, at least only as much as they are able to do things for him. He wouldn't be any more trouble hurting his family than a random stranger. Neither life has any meaning towards him. It's possible he could grow accustomed to his family, but he wouldn't truly care about them.
The fact that you talk about people you "care about" means you aren't a psychopath.

So think about yourself, who are you closest to in your family or friends and how do you feel about them? Would you be upset if they died? If you consciously hurt them, would you feel guilty about it? If you feel those emotions at all, you are not a psychopath.

As for caring about if you get in trouble, that is actually what keep most high-functioning psychopaths in line. Psychopaths don't want to go to jail more than anyone else.

The point about crying is interesting and leads me to believe that your issue is more regarding getting in touch with your emotions rather than not having them. A true psychopath would not feel awkward around a person crying at all. He'd do his best to "fake cry" too so he is seen as normal. The fact that you feel awkward means that you do recognize the emotion in someone else and it causes you to feel something too but you just don't feel comfortable expressing it. I'd like to hear from the claimed psychopaths here about how they feel when they are around someone who is crying. I'm guessing that they don't feel anything particular at all.

Abuse towards animals when young is common in psychopaths but it is common in children with other disorders too. And most of them grow out of it. The fact you have a pet cat now (and don't abuse it) is another sign you are not a psychopath. The bed-wetting thing about psychopaths has been disproven.

Setting fires is very common in children too. The key difference is that you say you didn't set the fire with the intent to burn a house down. Psychopaths DO set fires with the intent to cause destruction and burn things down. There is a huge difference between playing with fire, because fire is fun and neat to watch, and setting fires with the intent to destroy and harm.

You aren't the only one who has trouble getting upset about the tragedies in the world. I honestly believe that most people with no connection to Haiti are actually deeply upset by what happened. They only pretend to be because that is what society expects and they will donate money to make themselves feel better and look better to other people, but the tragedy does not keep them up at night and they don't cry about it. It's hard to care about something that is so far from home for most people. A psychopath, on the other hand, would feel just as detached from their mother, spouse, child, best friend, as we are to Haiti (actually even more so).

So far you seems mostly normal. You might have some other personality disorder but definitely not a psychopath. Get yourself some professional help and set your mind at ease.
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby jawhn » Thu Feb 11, 2010 10:53 pm

Haha, no, I don't want help. Like I said, I don't feel like there's anything wrong with me. All I wanted was opinions of what people had to say 'cause I saw definite similarities. I was just curious, not worried.
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby gio » Thu Feb 11, 2010 11:16 pm

jawhn wrote:Haha, no, I don't want help. Like I said, I don't feel like there's anything wrong with me. All I wanted was opinions of what people had to say 'cause I saw definite similarities. I was just curious, not worried.


Fine. I was just trying to help :(. Don't be mean, maybe you are a psychopath.
(just kidding).
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby jawhn » Thu Feb 11, 2010 11:18 pm

You were of help, and I wasn't being mean, haha
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby gio » Thu Feb 11, 2010 11:26 pm

jawhn wrote:You were of help, and I wasn't being mean, haha


yes I know, I was teasing you.
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby gio » Fri Feb 12, 2010 9:35 am

Whatchasay wrote:Cute, i didn't even have to read the wall of text, and i know you're just an angtsy teen who hates his family. You and 99% of the other teens of the world. Have a good life young one.


No, jawhn loves his family. He just hates everyone else in the world.
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Re: Psychopathy?

Postby insincerity » Fri Feb 12, 2010 3:20 pm

I'm not entirely sure how you are qualified to tell him he's not a psychopath, given your expressed contempt for those psychopaths that aren't diagnosed. If no one but a therapist can diagnose psychopathy, wouldn't logically no one but a therapist be able to diagnose you with not having psychopathy. Though the ways he expresses things does sound like he's at worst antisocial or just showing psychopathic tendencies or narcissism, what he interprets as caring for his parents could just be "attachment" or "dependence". It's very hard to differentiate those concepts if you don't truly understand what caring is, just what people around you tell you caring should be.
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