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What Made You The Way You Are Today?

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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby miss_lilith » Sat Feb 14, 2015 10:55 pm

- Was there anything that happened in your childhood that may have contributed to the way you are today? If yes, what was it?

Well, I grew up in a war zone and I've been abused pretty much every way possible, I've been held at a gunpoint by my own father more than once (for simply disobeying his orders)...

- To those of you with mental health issues, why do you think you are the way you are?

Nature and nurture.

- Do, or did, either of your parents have mental health issues?

Yes. Father has BPD and PTSD. mother's has NPD. Father's father is a sociopath. All of them formally diagnosed. Obviously, if I have a kid by some miracle, he/she is going to be the Antichrist. :twisted:

- If you have a strong desire to commit violence on a regular (or fairly regular) basis, do you think you have the violence gene (mentioned in the article I linked above)?

Quite possible. I mean, it would be almost shocking if I didn't have it, considering my family's gene pool.
I wonder, how many calories are burned by jumping to conclusions?
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby crystal_richardson_ » Sat Feb 14, 2015 11:22 pm

lilith,

do you think he did it out of selfishness, or to protect you?
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby miss_lilith » Sat Feb 14, 2015 11:37 pm

crystal_richardson_ wrote:lilith,

do you think he did it out of selfishness, or to protect you?



Not sure if it's either of the two. To understand the way he thinks, you have to understand where he's coming from. My father's a high - ranking military officer and he thinks of his family as of his unit, in a way. During the war, if a member of a unit conciously disregards orders by his superior, he risks getting his fellow soldiers in danger. Unruly soldiers are treated the same as traitors or deserters. There's no room for disobedience in my father's unit. You either live by his rules or die by them.
I wonder, how many calories are burned by jumping to conclusions?
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby crystal_richardson_ » Sat Feb 14, 2015 11:55 pm

so I guess it was unreasonable of him to apply that mindset to his family...

were you realistically putting yourself in danger though by doing things he considered disobedience (given that you were living in a war zone), or were they trivial things?
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby miss_lilith » Sun Feb 15, 2015 12:08 am

crystal_richardson_ wrote:so I guess it was unreasonable of him to apply that mindset to his family...

were you realistically putting yourself in danger though by doing things he considered disobedience (given that you were living in a war zone), or were they trivial things?


Well, he wasn't much at home during the war years, so most of those things happened afterwards. It was mostly trivial things. For example, once I got a "C" on my German exam when I was about 8, so he grabbed me by the hair, banged my head repeatedly against the wall and after getting no reaction from me (he was looking for fear, I suppose), pulled out his Beretta at me. The neighbours came over and helped calm him down. So, besides disobedience, he doesn't tolerate imperfection. His kids are a part of his image and reputation.
I wonder, how many calories are burned by jumping to conclusions?
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby crystal_richardson_ » Sun Feb 15, 2015 1:13 am

that reminds me a bit of my parents :)

they were going to kick me out and never wanted to see me again for a bad grade in high school but decided last minute not. I didn't even know they had such expectations--that's what really bugged me :? so it was really a surprise.

our family had bad communication though. and it just seemed like everyone wanted to get away from each other--dad always wanting to leave the family and go live somewhere else and blaming me to my face, etc.--yet we celebrated most traditions (Christmas, etc.).

or maybe this was just how I felt and maybe they just wanted to get away from me or me to go away.

there was definitely that element of overreaction to things they saw they could not control though, like I think your dad displayed.
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby miss_lilith » Sun Feb 15, 2015 1:26 pm

LOL, did your grades improve after that discovery? :P

I think it was his way of trying to make the best of the situation he couldn't get out of (the situation being marriage). He married my mother to spite his father and had me to "soften" his family enough to not write him out of the will. Of course, soon enough he realised that that was a huge fck up, but being a Catholic, he couldn't get a divorce (yet, that didn't stop him from having affairs and kids on the side :mrgreen: ). So, by being so strict on me and attempting to mold me to fit into his vision, he was trying to make things more bearable to himself.

Or, he was unconsciously blaming me for cementing the #######5 situation he put himself in.
I wonder, how many calories are burned by jumping to conclusions?
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby crystal_richardson_ » Sun Feb 15, 2015 2:13 pm

I left home shortly after that :)

I actually didn't even know at the time what was going on because they told years later.

(talk about bad communication! I could have been homeless by that time :evil:)

But ya I can relate to that strictness, and with a side order of retardedness :roll:
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby thesocialplayer » Sun Feb 22, 2015 7:06 pm

My family has a history of mental disorders. However, apparently my mother said their are many "Joan of Arc"s in our family tree, of whom was this fine young lady.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rani_Lakshmibai
Everything can be worked with.
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Re: What Made You The Way You Are Today?

Postby p0ster » Sun Feb 22, 2015 8:01 pm

That's cool Socialplayer! :shock:

Our family just has Irish and Scottish roots, that's all I know because beyond my great great grandparents, it is unknown and it apparently costs some money to find your family tree out here.
If you don't want people to know about it, don't put it out there.

Think before you post.
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