Can't believe I might be an abuser

For years, I have been working on my anger management and then the other day a new term got thrown my way......"you are verbally abusive." Not even sure what it all means, I got to looking it up. I fit many, not all, of the criteria that I read. I fortunately have an appointment with my regular counselor tomorrow afternoon and hope to get started on fixing this. I feel absolutely awful reconciling with the fact that this may indeed be something I have been doing. I do not feel that it is all a one sided affair, which means of course it probably is all my issue and I am trying to deflect. I am quite sad at the moment and want nothing but to heal and stop my outrageous behavior. Please offer any advice on the topic

Everyone is different. Every situation is unique. While it may be true that you are verbally abusive, I've found that true abuse usually requires intent on some level. That's not to say all of it does. Lashing out in anger is never healthy, but it's not good to blame yourself for something that you may or may not have had control over. Knowing that you have a problem and seeking help are excellent steps to recovery. I wish you the best of skill (Luck is fickle. Skill can be relied on).