Alcohol abuse

My dad is an alcoholic for 20 years now. I don't really live with him since he's incapable of caring for me, however, his drinking problem has affected me too much. Whenever I am stressed or just depressed I escape into alcohol abuse. I drink a lot, mix it with pills and go to sleep.

I can't stop this addiction, I keep hoping that it's the last time I'll ever wake up...

There are ways out. For me, it was NA. For others, AA, group or one on one therapy, secular groups. Don't believe the lies your addiction feeds you. You're capable of quitting, and there are many, many people who have -- and who are willing to help you.

I'm starting therapy soon to help me through this problem, but I cannot seem to resist drinking if I see a bottle of wine out or something of that sort. I've tried hiding the bottles to help me stop, and it has helped a bit - sometimes I feel unable to cope with this however.

Thanks for the reply c:

I had to get rid of all alcohol in my house in the initial period. All went down the drain.

Oliveira wrote:I had to get rid of all alcohol in my house in the initial period. All went down the drain.

I did the same - all alcohol removed from the home. There was an unopened bottle of wine and my SO gave it to the neighbor. Better safe than sorry.

@persistent: good luck with therapy, when do you start it?

That is a useful thing to do, I'll try getting rid of all the alcohol.
Ah thank you, and my therapy is starting in two weeks time.

Good luck with the therapy!

In the meantime here's a tool for you to use. (I learned it at NA). It's called "Just for today". When you feel a craving to drink, tell yourself: it's fine, I'll have a drink, just not today. (If "today" is too much, replace it with "not until dinner time" or "not in the next hour"). Then, when that next hour or dinner time arrives, and you still feel a craving, tell yourself: I'll have a drink, just not for another hour/not until tomorrow.

And then tomorrow arrives and guess what: now that tomorrow is today. So you can totally have a drink! But not today. (Not until 10/not until lunchtime/...) It's much easier to stop yourself from drinking for a short period -- one day, a few hours -- than to immediately embrace the idea of "NEVER". Never is a very long time. Who knows what will happen in a year or two? We may all be dead. All that matters is now. So you won't drink now -- for an hour or a few hours. And when that time has passed, promise yourself again: I won't drink now -- for an hour or a day.

Coupled with removing alcohol from the house -- so you actually have to go and get it rather than just reach for a bottle -- it might make it easier to last until your therapy begins. I know it might not sound like a magical spell -- but it worked for me in the first weeks. And then cravings lessened and I didn't need it so often anymore. And now I don't need it at all, but it's good to know I've got this tool at my disposal if needed.

Big hugs!

Hi, your in real danger of dying from the mixture of pills and alcohol. If it's possible for you to stop drinking you may find anti-depressants very helpful. You really have to admit that alcohol has really kicked your ass and that you can't stop on your own to really be open to suggestions you get from AA or whomever you are seeking help from.

Good luck, hope all goes well.

I was in the exact same spot you are in. It's been a year and a half for me. What I've discovered is that the triggers to drink for me where long buried issues that sprung emotions I didn't know how to deal with, ones in my denial I didn't even know I had they where so buried. I recommend getting support like AA so you can be around those who will not only understand but really seek to help you in your plight plus it helps when you so stop to deal with the issues that you will discover after taking off the mask. Not everyone you meet in AA you will like (like anywhere) or agree with (sometimes that's good for learning) but you will find your people and they will be there for you. If I can get there and not even feel the compulsion (I still feel the underlying issues which I'm getting back to working on) to drink, so can you..because in the end I couldn't talk to anyone without even having a beer and when the alcohol was gone, that was my timer that I couldn't stick around any longer. I never, in my wildest dreams thought I'd end up that way. If I can do it, so can you.

-- Sat Jan 23, 2016 8:17 am --

I was in the exact same spot you are in. It's been a year and a half for me. What I've discovered is that the triggers to drink for me where long buried issues that sprung emotions I didn't know how to deal with, ones in my denial I didn't even know I had they where so buried. I recommend getting support like AA so you can be around those who will not only understand but really seek to help you in your plight plus it helps when you so stop to deal with the issues that you will discover after taking off the mask. Not everyone you meet in AA you will like (like anywhere) or agree with (sometimes that's good for learning) but you will find your people and they will be there for you. If I can get there and not even feel the compulsion (I still feel the underlying issues which I'm getting back to working on) to drink, so can you..because in the end I couldn't talk to anyone without even having a beer and when the alcohol was gone, that was my timer that I couldn't stick around any longer. I never, in my wildest dreams thought I'd end up that way. If I can do it, so can you.

I can sympathize with you. You are not alone in this struggle. Try not to get discouraged. Please take heart in knowing that there are new treatments available today. There is also amazing new research into the human brain that show how our fears, behaviors and yes, even addictions are being looked at as "learned" behaviors now - that can be "unlearned" by a variety of methods, some using common non-addictive medications to help with the unlearning.